祂一直在等我
我從小就在基督徒的家庭長大, 去教會, 去主日學似乎是很平常的事, 但當時我並不知道我自己為什麼要相信耶穌, 很多的聖經真理那時候的我其實也不太清楚。一直到我離開台灣到了加拿大念書參加了校園團契我才真正明白我的信仰, 認識了主耶穌。在大學時期我開始嘗試錄自己的小廣播錄音, 漸漸發展成寫詩歌。當時的我缺乏信心, 害怕走出自己的舒適圈, 也太在乎別人的眼光, 於是, 在我當了母親之後我給自己藉口-以為多了母親的身分, 我有充足的理由忽略神放在我裡面的呼召。將近七年, 我幾乎沒有動筆再寫….我甚至覺得自己離敬拜神很遙遠。
好不容易我鼓起勇氣想再回到音樂跟敬拜中, 我開始在自己的教會司琴服事。當時我真的很喜樂我又回來敬拜團隊了, 萬萬沒想到才服事三個月, 我就因為一次住院開刀的化驗結果診斷出我得了淋巴癌四期。我曾想過為什麼當我回來音樂服事時, 我又必須放下, 面對化療跟漫長的治療療程….神的心意到底是甚麼。
一直到我入院接受化療的那一天, 我帶著恐懼不安的心想著接下來我的生命會是甚麼樣子, 我的先生跟我們四個孩子還有我們全家要面臨的巨大改變, 這一切我幾乎無法承受。就在那一刻, 神對我說話。祂說 「你從水中經過 ， 我必與你同在； 你逿過江河 ， 水必 不漫過你 ； 你從火中行過 ， 必不被燒 ， 火燄也不著在你身上。」以賽亞書 43:2
這是祂的應許, 祂帶我回想到九年前我懷著雙胞胎卻需要拿掉大腫瘤的過程-神的保護與醫治。當祂帶我數算祂過去未曾停止過的恩典與良善時, 心中的音樂再次響起, 我也開始了我在病房寫詩歌的歷程。原來, 神從來沒有忘記我…祂一直在等我, 等我回應祂起初的呼召, 等我回到祂的敬拜裡……..
I grew up in a Christian family, going to church and Sunday school as a child—but I didn’t truly understand why I believed in Jesus. It wasn’t until I studied in Canada and joined a campus fellowship that I came to know the Lord personally.
In university, I began recording small broadcasts, which slowly grew into writing songs. Yet for years, I let fear, self-doubt, and life’s responsibilities—especially motherhood—keep me from responding to God’s calling. I almost forgot what it meant to worship Him.
When I finally returned to music, serving as a pianist in my church, joy filled my heart—but just three months later, I was diagnosed with stage IV lymphoma. Facing chemotherapy and uncertainty, I wondered what God’s plan was.
On the day I was admitted for chemotherapy, fear and uncertainty filled my heart. I thought about the life ahead, the enormous changes my husband, our four children, and our family would face. It all felt almost unbearable. And then, in that moment, God spoke to me:
“When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you; when you walk through the fire, you will not be burned.” —Isaiah 43:2
Reflecting on His past faithfulness and protection, my heart began to sing again. I started writing songs in the hospital ward, and I realized: God has never forgotten me. He has been waiting all along—for me to respond, for me to return to His worship, and to trust His presence through every season of life.
Shannon's Music-Songs in the Valley 